Call to Worship (Ephesians 3:17-18, Good News Bible abb.)
May God from the wealth of his glory
help you to be strong in your inner selves.
May Christ make his home in your hearts.
May you have your roots and foundation in love,
So that you may have the power to understand
how broad and long, how high and deep is Christ’s love.

Unison Prayer
May we be rooted in our faith.
May our roots extend to others,
and may we be connected by God. Amen.

Words of Assurance: from Psalm 1, Good News Bible
Those who obey the Lord are like trees that grow beside a stream,
that bear fruit at the right time, and whose leaves do not dry up.

The Lord’s Prayer
Our Father,
who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread;
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil;
for thine is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory forever.
Amen.

Opening Song: Emily Rose, Bethel Music, “Tend”

Scripture Reading: Jeremiah 17:7-8, Good News Bible
I will bless the person who puts his trust in me. He is like a tree growing near a stream and sending out roots to the water. It is not afraid when hot weather comes, because its leaves stay green; it has no worries when there is no rain; it keeps on bearing fruit.

Sunday Sermon

This week, two dozen women from our church are attending a women’s retreat at Camp Quinipet on Shelter Island. When I started thinking about themes for this week’s sermon, I first considered “Left Behind.” Then I thought about doing a sermon about men, but then I remembered that not all of the women were going on the retreat. Then the Bible study group suggested I talk about the same topic here as they are talking about there, and that made sense. So this is a sermon on being rooted.

What does it mean to be rooted? I grew up in Connecticut, although I’ve spent most of my life in New York. When I said this to someone the other day, he said, “Oh, you’re not from here.” I was actually born in Rhode Island, moved to Ohio, moved to Fairfield CT, then Westport CT, then Trumbull CT, all before finishing 4th grade. Then I went to school in Ohio, then in Georgia, which made me ready for the life of a traveling pastor: four years in Yonkers, three in Westhampton Beach and seven in Lagrangeville before returning to Long Island in 2002.

So where are my roots? You might say Trumbull, but since I lived there my father passed away, my mother and sister and friends moved, the pastors changed, the church changed, the park is surrounded by condominiums, the tiny mall is huge, the mom-and-pop stores turned into Starbucks’s, and as Joni Mitchell sings, “They paved paradise and put up a parking lot.” It brings to mind the ship of Theseus: if you replace a ship, part by part, until the whole ship is different, is it still the same ship?

Geographically, it would be easy to say that I have no roots, unless I take a map and a protractor and draw a hundred mile circle around the place I live now. That’s when I realize that I do have geographic roots, and that the root system runs further than I had imagined. This being said, the roots are not the places, but the people. That’s why the symbol of a family is a family tree ~ but when one adds friends to a family tree, one can see a forest.

In a forest, trees send out roots not only to find nourishment, but to connect with other root systems for mutual support. A tree whose roots run deep and are intertwined with other roots is less likely to fall in a storm. According to Proverbs, “two are better than one, because if one falls, the other can help them up.” In the Apocrypha, Sirach writes, “A loyal friend is like a safe shelter; find one, and you have found a treasure. Nothing else is as valuable; there is no way of putting a price on it. A loyal friend is like a medicine that keeps you in good health.”

Last week we talked about an “epidemic of loneliness.” The opposite of loneliness is connection. One can feel connected to each other in a church; the women on the retreat are building connections; but we are connected to them as well, especially because we’re talking about the same things. Last year I learned that some of the people on the retreat were reading the morning sermon online, so what I’m saying here may already have been read there.

The Biblical theme of rootedness is to be rooted in God: to be nourished by one’s faith, and to connect to others. The branches above the tree are as important as the roots below. King David and Jeremiah both write about a tree near a stream, sending roots to the water. We are that tree. Paul extends the parable: “May you have your roots and foundation in love.” When we do, we receive four promises in the form of four additional parables:

We will not be afraid when hot weather comes; our leaves will stay green;
We will have no worries when there is no rain; we will keep bearing fruit.

Or to paraphrase: no worries, no fear, and a rich and productive life. These are the promises of every motivational speaker; but they are also the promises of God.

Yesterday I lost a caterpillar in my house. Or it may have been an inchworm, or more accurately, a centimeter worm. It was on my pants and I thought it was a small twig and I brushed it off, but just before I brushed it off, it moved. And then it landed on my carpet and I couldn’t find it again. And then I thought, this poor creature, it was just outside and now it’s in the middle of wall-to-wall carpet with no water and no food and it will probably die. Or who knows, maybe a month from now a butterfly will fly out of my basement. The same thing was true last Sunday morning when I noticed all the worms on the parking lot pavement, looking for dirt. Imagine not knowing how to get back to your home.

But the tree that is planted by the stream knows how to survive. It knows where the nourishment is and how to reach it. When we are worried and afraid, we’re not like the caterpillar or the worm, lost in the carpet or the pavement; we’re like the tree by the stream; although to be fair, some of us are stubborn trees or contrary trees or ornery trees and we don’t take advantage of the good things that are right next to us, and by good things I mean family, friends and faith. When need company, we look for the remote; when we need community, we go online. Then hard times come, and we feel parched. Where is the rain? Where is the cool weather? Where is the stream? What did we do wrong?

Jesus tells his disciples, “The seed falling on rocky ground refers to someone who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away.” In contrast, the person who has roots is like the good seed, who produces a good crop.

If you don’t have roots, or if your roots are bad, where do you start? Jesus tells his disciples, “if you have the faith of a mustard seed, you can move mountains.” This is a double parable: it means if you only have a little, you can still do a lot; and over time, the little you have will grow.

I’m going to close today with a double parable of my own, or a single parable with two interpretations. Only a few weeks ago, I could see the water from my house. Now I can’t. This is the quickest I have ever seen leaves grow. It tells me how quickly good things can happen, seemingly out of nowhere. The other part of the parable is that even though I can’t see the water, I know it’s still there. It is exactly the same number of steps to the water now as it was when I could see it. But to get there, now I have to take the steps.

Most of us who live on Long Island love the ocean. Otherwise, why would we live here? And I always say to everyone, once the weather is warmer, get to the beach, or to the boat. But the ocean is always there, even in the winter. And God is always there: an endless ocean, a stream of life-giving water, a river of life, a lake of peace, waiting for us to dive in, to be nourished, to be connected and to be fed. May we grow where we are planted. May our seeds sprout and flourish, and may our roots run deep. Amen.

Closing Song: David Crowder Band, “I Am a Seed”

This week a large portion of our congregation will be on the Women’s Retreat at Camp Quinipet. Our Sunday theme will be the same as their weekend theme: “Rooted.” Whether you are here or there this Sunday, at home or away, we wish you the blessings of being rooted in God’s love, in family, and in community! If you’re staying locally, we invite you to join us for worship at 10 a.m. this Sunday!

Call to Worship (from Psalm 27): 
The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?
Though a host camp against me, my heart shall not fear;
Though war rise around me, yet I will be confident.
Wait for the LORD; sing and make melody.
Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage.

Unison Prayer:  Marianne Williamson, adapted
Dear God, many of us are desperate for hope.  We are afraid to dream; our spirits are in turmoil.  Please bless us all, and bring us ever closer to each other.  Open our hearts and eyes and ears, that we might know and hear each other, in our joy and in our pain.  Amen. 

Words of Assurance:  Psalm 34:18, NIV
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

The Lord’s Prayer
Our Father,
who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread;
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil;
for thine is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory forever.
Amen.

Opening Song: SherellHodge, “Have You Ever”

Scripture Reading:  Psalm 42:1-5, Good News Bible
As a deer longs for a stream of cool water, so I long for you, O God. I thirst for you, the living God. When can I go and worship in your presence? Day and night I cry, and tears are my only food; all the time my enemies ask me, “Where is your God?” My heart breaks when I remember the past, when I went with the crowds to the house of God and led them as they walked along, a happy crowd, singing and shouting praise to God. Why am I so sad? Why am I so troubled? I will put my hope in God, and once again I will praise him, my savior and my God.

Sunday Sermon

A couple months ago, right after I beat my friend in a volleyball game, he said, “I need 15 Guinnesses.” This oddly specific statement seemed like an overreaction, so I asked why. His one-word answer: “Minnesota.”

It took me a moment to understand what was going on. At the time, it was common knowledge that there were terrible things happening in Minnesota. But in this case, my friend had been unable to get them out of his mind, even in the middle of a volleyball game, and he attributed his poor play to the fact that he wasn’t able to think straight, and his proposed solution to not thinking straight was to drink lots of alcohol.

Have you ever had Percocet? Percocet is great, and I mean that in a terrible way. I was on Percocet when I had kidney stones, and they took away all my pain. I mean all my pain, like even my existential pain. And that scared me, because I thought, “this is way too good.” So I only took the pills when I absolutely needed them and ended up with half a bottle of unused pills. I was telling this story to a parishioner (not in this church) and she said, “Can you give them to me?” I was like, “What?” She said, “Or can I buy them from you? How much do you want?” She said her painkillers had run out and she wasn’t able to get more until the first of the month. But I didn’t feel comfortable with it and went home and looked it up and saw that it would be illegal, and when I told her I couldn’t do it she said I was a bad and selfish minister.

Recently I ran into a former youth group member who was now in her 30s. I asked how she was doing and she said she was okay. But when I asked about her friends, she said, “I don’t really have any friends.” She had tried it on her own for a while, moved in with a dysfunctional boyfriend, then broken up with him and moved back in with her parents. I told her, “You could have called me.” She said, “I know, but I didn’t want to bother you.”

For us to talk meaningfully about mental health, we first need to acknowledge that these are not rare examples, but common experiences, and far more common than we think. We’ve been reading about an “epidemic of loneliness” that has affected people across the board, not only older adults but younger ones. Many studies have connected the problem to social media, cellphones, doomscrolling, over-scheduling, video games, poor parenting, political polarization, shrinking church attendance and – you’ll love this one because it came from the conservative church – giving women the right to vote. All of these except for the last one are legitimate contributors, but not the root causes.

Mental health issues are nothing new, and are found throughout the Bible. This week I started inflicting a new series on our Bible study group titled, “The 10 Most Depressing Psalms.” I asked if they wanted to start with the most depressing and work their way down or the tenth-most depressing and work their way up. They said, “Let’s start with the most depressing one and get it over with.” The winner – which was also named “the most emo Psalm” is Psalm 88, which includes these lines:

Why, Lord, do you reject me?
You have overwhelmed me with all your waves.
You have taken from me friend and neighbor,
and darkness is my only friend.

King David is having a terrible, no good, very bad day. He has a lot of these days. In Psalm 42 he writes, “Tears are my only food.” In Psalm 22 he writes, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”, which is quoted by Jesus on the cross. But David isn’t the only one in the Bible to be depressed. There’s the dynamic duo of Job and Ecclesiastes, who some might say wrote the Bible’s most depressing books. Job has nothing and Ecclesiastes has everything, which demonstrates that mental health issues can happen to everyone. And then there’s Judas and Peter, who both fall into complete anguish after betraying and denying their Lord. Judas gives up and kills himself, but Peter pushes through it, living long enough to feel the Lord’s forgiveness, and becomes one of the church’s greatest leaders. The combination of their stories shows us that there is a way out.

The books of Job, Ecclesiastes and Psalms are three of the most important books in the Bible not just for their wisdom, but for their example. Each book is an acknowledgment of severe emotional problems, in Job brought on by loss, in Psalms by sin and in Ecclesiastes by ennui. Ecclesiastes is upset that the poor are oppressed, the rich have their way, and nothing ever seems to change. David commits adultery, has a man killed and suddenly realizes he’s not the great man he thought he was; in fact, he’s not even good. Job loses his family and his possessions and develops leprosy. Two of them have what we would call good reasons to be depressed. But all three have one thing in common that is not common today: they talk about it. And because they do, they give us permission to do so as well.

Possibly the worst thing about mental health is not the problem, but the stigma attached to it. Last week a person killed his children and the news reported that “he had been struggling with mental health issues.” This sort of talk is harmful to the general topic because it associates mental health issues with violent crime, to such an extent that people want to avoid any hint of not being well, for fear of being labeled.

We tend to put people on one side or the other – mentally health or mentally ill. But this is not an accurate way to talk about mental health. In contrast, we have no problem talking about physical health. Perhaps we talk so much about our physical health to make up for how little we talk about our mental health. Physical health is a scale; we’re either at the bottom, the top or somewhere in-between, and we keep moving up and down the scale throughout our lives. The same thing is true of mental health, and once we look at it this way, and understand that everyone is on the scale, the stigma dissipates.

So let me tell you about my week. I had seven decent days and six decent nights, but I had one night that was so bad it nearly outweighed the rest of the week. That was a night when everything folded in on me: every doubt, every misgiving, every bad memory and bad decision, including all the things God had already forgiven me for but I felt like ruminating on all over again. To quote King David, “tears were my only food, and darkness was my only friend.” Thankfully, you missed all this. I can hide it really well. But I also think it’s important for me to share it.

Why am I like this? Some of it has to do with genetics, which are inescapable. I am the child of an alcoholic on one side of the family and a grandchild of an alcoholic on the other. Both sides of the family have depression and suicide, while different branches have overeating, domestic abuse and drug addiction. All of this was funneled into me. It is part of my DNA. It is entirely possible that had I not met God, I would be dead by now. But this did not make me immune. In fact, some of the worst times of my life have happened since I became a Christian. David writes that other people are saying of him, “Where is your God?” The misunderstanding is that God will protect us from every moment of despair; but it’s just not true. Ask Jesus in the Garden. Instead, God has promised to be with us in every moment of despair, even if we doubt it or don’t sense it. In the moment, we may feel completely abandoned, relying only on the promises and the words.

Here’s something important to remember about Job and David: they never stop praying. They keep praying even when they think God is absent, has turned against them or is not listening. They keep praying even when they’re not sure if the sun ever will come out tomorrow. David writes, “Why am I so sad? Why am I so troubled? I will put my hope in God, and once again I will praise him.” The proof of this is not in the 42nd Psalm, but in the entire book of Psalms; David has days of pain, days of sorrow, days of depression, days of anger, days of failure, days of mercy, days of forgiveness, days of reassessment, days of calm, days of contentment and days of praise. And this is a normal life. He writes “once again I will praise him” because he’s been through it before. In the same way, I know that I will be unwell again. We will be unwell again. There is no avoiding it; no getting around it, no jumping over it, no skipping it, and no amount of words that will make it go away. And as soon as we realize this, we will be healthier.

So where does our faith come in? The apostle Paul writes, “Every test that you have experienced is the kind that normally comes to people. But God keeps his promise, and he will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out” (1 Corinthians 10:13). It’s amazing how much wisdom is in Scripture! Paul is basically saying, “Whatever you’re going through, you’re not the only one. Someone else, probably lots of people, are going through the same thing right now or have been through it before and come out on the other side. You can handle this with God’s help. There is a way out. So don’t give up your faith; practice it even when it doesn’t seem to be working.”

I’m going to share one more unhappy story in order to make a point. I once knew a wonderful Christian woman who struggled with mental illness. Her doctor had prescribed a combination of therapy and medication, but her pastor told her that if her faith was strong enough she wouldn’t need either. So she began every day with two hours of anguished prayer, and felt more and more guilty and unworthy because it wasn’t working. The last I heard of her she had lost her job and her apartment and shut out all of her friends. The point is, although God can do anything, there are some sorts of illness that cannot be solved through prayer.

There are two times in my life so far that I’ve been to therapy. One was a lock away camp for children of alcoholics, followed by years of meetings. That’s where I learned where many of my problems came from and how to deal with them. The second was a check-in, a few months of therapy when I wasn’t sure of myself and needed someone to help me process my feelings. Both were great. If you go to a doctor for regular check-ups, and also go when you suspect there’s something wrong with you, then think of going to a therapist as a mental health check-up. We all know the old story of how God sent a person a car, a boat and a plane to save his life, but he wouldn’t take them; in this case, God sends doctors, therapists and medications; please take advantage of them as you would vitamins or exercise.

And finally, remember that God has not deserted you. In the book of Genesis, Hagar is crying and praying so hard that she doesn’t notice she is next to a well. In Luke, two people are so sad that Jesus is dead that they are walking right next to him, not knowing that he is alive. Sometimes God will seem absent or invisible or non-existent, but this doesn’t change the fact that God is there. We pray for the strength to get through these times, until we can hear God, and feel God, and praise God again. Amen.

Closing Song: MercyMe, “Make It Well”

Benediction: Max Ehrmann, The Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.